sunflowers. [noah]

[steph]

To say Allison Giancola wasn’t upset was the understatement of the year.

Looking at the flowers, she reached out and grabbed one as someone came up to her and offered her some help. With a sweet smile, she declined. She knew exactly what she was looking for and she didn’t need anyone’s help on it other than her maybe carrying it home. That would be a pain. She’d have to have someone take it to the taxi for her once she called one up. Leather gloves were on her hands to keep them from callusing or getting cut up as she wheeled herself around. She was upset. Very upset…

Three weeks ago, she’d been in a hospital bed with a ruptured kidney that had to be removed. They told her she could live with one kidney but that it would make getting pregnant in the future, if that was her plan, much more difficult and more hazardous to her own safety and well being. Though Ali hadn’t thought about having another child at all, the thought that she might not be able to-when she once had the perfect ability to-had frazzled her and caused her to so easily pull away from Noah. It wasn’t like it was his fault. How was either of them supposed to know someone would shoot her in the middle of a mall overpass? No, it wasn’t her husband’s fault and Allison, being Allison, was blaming herself entirely for everything that had happened. In a way she’d become distant and being told she had to minimize walking until she fully healed (because if she spent one more day in that hospital bed, she was going to through a huge fit) didn’t help her situation. Her legs were perfectly functional it was just that the pain killers they gave her made her sleepy so she put up with the pain in her lower left side all day. She was so irritated by the pain lately, not being able to work, not being to really do anything, that whenever she saw Johnny or spoke to him when he’d come to visit, she’d give him agitated and frustrated replies, wave her hand as if to dismiss him. She was just so exasperated with the entire thing. Allison had always been moving, always doing something that now that she was limited to not being able to do what she used to, she was ready to explode. No surfing, no swimming, no jogging, no yoga, no dancing, no walking, no using the steps, not being able to get from A to B without needing some king of assistance…

But today was different. Leaving the flower shop, she headed home. Despite still being married to Noah and her not being able to go up and down her stairs without taking a good twenty minutes from having to take it one step at a time (unless she was taking the pills then she’d be fine…but get tired after an hour), she still didn’t move in temporarily with Noah. His place was already much too big for her and she had grown out of living in such lavishing places. Her apartment located on the fifth floor of the building was a small one bedroom apartment with a living room, kitchen, breakfast nook, bathroom, and porch (though that was a fire escape she converted into a so called sun deck). It wasn’t too small or too big and it was just the right size for her. It was cozy and she liked that she paid the bills there even if the place charged way too much for such a limited area. When finally there, she set the bright sunflowers on the kitchen table. It was officially one year since Johnny died and she’d made it her mission to have sunflowers in his memory. He used to love sunflower seeds so why not? They were more cheerful than wilting roses or white lilies.

Hearing the buzzer, she rolled on over and opened the door, already knowing it was bound to be Noah since she hadn’t answered her texts all day. She unlocked the door so he could just come in and then using the table as her stand, slowly stood from the wheelchair and letting her knuckles turn white as she held her breathe. She had one hell of a scar from the surgery and just as she fully stood in the white, long sleeved sundress she wore (loose from the waist down as the doctor told her), the door opened and she glanced over her thin shoulder at Noah before looking at the sunflowers, “One year.”

She knew he’d understand exactly what she was saying.