THREE WORDS , EIGHT LETTERS

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

Yawning, her eyes drifted to the mangled body next to her. The man, whose name was not important, gave her a sheepish grin before mumbling something in French about leaving. She rolled over, her back to his, feeling nothing but emptiness like the last time and all the times before. These men meant nothing to her in the long run; all she craved was a warm body to pretend was someone else. Her life was a pile of mayhem right now, and there was nothing she could do about it. For the first time in a long time, her mother called her constantly, asking if she was alright. The first two times she had answered, admitting that yes, she was in Paris, and no, she wasn’t coming back any time soon. Eventually, her mother’s voice got repetitive and she just began to ignore her mother. Her friends, of course, were next in line to ignore. Shasta and Reese had called and texted constantly, but she ignored the two. There were only two people who should be calling constantly, begging for forgiveness, but neither had called. That, of course, was a factor she was not surprised about. Sevvie had too much pride to beg for forgiveness, and Porter…well, he had never loved her.

Tears began trickling down her face as she heard the door to the suite slam shut. All she wanted was to feel wanted, to know that someone wanted her. All of the men that had come in and out of the room the last two weeks wanted her for one night, nothing more. Those men had been the same to Charlotte, but wasn’t Paris the city of romance? Where was her Prince Charming? Obviously, whoever was writing her story had a cruel sense of humor and had no idea how much pain she was in. Her heart ached. Her whole body ached. And her mind was laughing at her, calling her heart stupid and telling her that the brain was always right. Yes, she should have guarded her heart more, but she had let her guard down, proving to be a mistake. Porter had wanted her for the money, nothing else, and she had expected more. She truly had. He had let her down, that was the truth, but she had let herself down. Obviously she hadn’t done enough to make him realize that there was such a thing as love, but maybe now, he was right. Maybe love was a stupid emotion, a useless one that no human should ever have.
Taking in deep breath, she rolled out of bed and began to get ready for another day in Paris, France. The days had been filled with shopping and flirting with foreign boys, but she wanted to sight see. Sure, she had seen all of the monuments before, but this time, she needed to see one for a different purpose. There was one monument that knew her better than anything or anyone, one that allowed her to freely think without worrying about getting judged. Her mind whirled at the anticipation as she left the hotel and began the short walk to the monument. It would take a while for her to get all the way to the top, but it was worth it. Her legs would kill, her feet would be mad that she wore heels, but that was alright. An elevator took her up a couple of flights before depositing her to highest one. A hundred steps later, she opened the door and made her way onto the observation deck of the Eiffel Tower.

Looming over the entire city of Paris, she felt free. Finally, even just for a moment, she felt as though no one could be cruel. She could live on the tower, if it was possible. But it wasn’t and she made her way to the ledge before resting her arms upon it. Cars honked below and she smiled to herself. Yes, this is where she belonged. She belonged in a city that served desert for breakfast that gave coffee with every meal, had designer shops at every corner and where no one knew her. No one in Paris cared that she had been closed to being married twice, that her heart was shattered, that he had been his heartbreak. At least he had been her mistake and no one else could take that. Her brown eyes focused on a speck of a person wandering around the entrance of the tower, with brown hair. No, she was forcing herself to imagine that that strange man was him, that he wanted her again.

Sighing, she turned around, and let out a small gasp. No, no no no. This was just her imaging, hoping, that he was back. There was no way he had found out where she was; that was impossible. Her friends wouldn’t tell him of all people. But as her brown eyes focused in on the figure in front of her, who was holding red roses and other boxes, she knew this was true. Porter Middleton had found her.

But, of course, she could not just run into his arms and kiss him. He had broken her heart, had lied to her, and had betrayed her. This had to be another one of his tricks. Charlotte knew that. Porter didn’t know what love was. She rested her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side. ”Can I help you?” she said nonchalantly, almost bored by the fact that he was in her presence, when, in fact, she was ecstatic. Her stomach was filled with butterflies, begging her to open her mouth and admit that she still loved him. But he needed to say it first, to admit that he was wrong, to admit that he needed her. It would never happen, though. Her fairytale had been crushed and he was the reason for it.

you're too curious for your own good

template made by pan of caution 2.0

[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you THE FLIGHT FROM NEW YORK TO PARIS HAD BEEN TORTURE. HE'D ALREADY HAD TWO LAY-OVERS WHILE STILL IN THE STATES, AND THEN THE RIDE FROM NEW YORK TO PARIS JUST ADDED TO HIS STRESS AND IMPATIENCE. HE KEPT DOUBTING CHARLOTTE WOULD EVEN BE IN PARIS WHEN HE GOT THERE - IF HE EVER GOT THERE. SVET HAD BEEN HIGH WHEN SHE'D VOWED THAT PARIS WAS WHERE HER FORMER-BEST FRIEND WOULD RUN WHEN SHE WAS FEELING DOWN. HE JUST HOPED BEYOND HOPE THAT SVET WAS RIGHT AND HE'D FIND CHARLOTTE THERE. REMEMBERING ALL OF THE PAINTINGS AND PHOTOGRAPHS SHE'D HAD OF THE EIFFEL TOWER, HE FIGURED HE'D TRY THERE FIRST. IF HE DIDN'T FIND HER ON HIS FIRST GUESS, HE'D SEARCH THE WHOLE DAMN CITY UNTIL HE FOUND HER. NEVER BEFORE IN HIS LIFE HAD PORTER EVER REALLY TRIED FOR ANYTHING HE WANTED. HE'D BEEN GIVEN MOST OF WHAT HE WANTED, HAVING BEEN BORN INTO A WEALTHY FAMILY, AND HE'D NEVER REALLY HAD THE WILL TO GO AFTER ANYTHING BEFORE. PLUS, HE'D NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE BEFORE CHARLOTTE. LAUGHING AT HIMSELF AND NOT CARING IF THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM THOUGHT HE WAS CRAZY, HE STEPPED OFF OF THE ELEVATOR FROM HIS HOTEL AND WALKED OUT ONTO THE CHAMPS ELYSEES. HE COULD SEE THE TOWER STANDING OUT PROMINENTLY IN THE DISTANCE, AND HE CALLED A CAB TO TAKE HIM. SOON ENOUGH, HE WAS STANDING AT THE BASE OF THE TOWER, LOOKING UPWARD AND PRAYING SHE WAS HERE. AS HE WALKED WITH THE CROWD INSIDE, HE BEGAN RUNNING OVER HIS PLAN IN HIS MIND. HE HELD THE RED BOX OF CHOCOLATES IN ONE HAND AND A DOZEN RED ROSES IN THE OTHER. THIS WASN'T ALL HE HAD PLANNED, BUT HE HAD TO FIND HER BEFORE HE COULD CALL THE REST OF HIS PLAN IN ACTION. THANKFULLY, HE HAD THE VIOLIN PLAYER ON SPEED DIAL, AND CONSIDERING HOW MUCH HE WAS PAYING THE BASTARD, HE BETTER BE READY AT A MOMENT'S NOTICE. THE ELEVATOR PING-ED AND MADE HIM START. LOOKING AROUND AND COMING OUT OF HIS DAYDREAMS, HE EXITED ALONGSIDE THE REST OF THE TOURISTS AND BEGAN WALKING FOR THE STAIRS. THE FRENCH REALLY COULDN'T MAKE THIS ANY EASIER COULD THEY? LEAVE IT TO CHARLOTTE TO LOVE SOMETHING THAT WAS SUCH A PAIN IN THE ASS. SMILING TO HIMSELF AT THE THOUGHT, HE CLIMBED THE STAIRS WITHOUT EVEN BECOMING WINDED. HE WAS TOO WORRIED ABOUT WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO CARE ABOUT HIMSELF. HE'D LIED TO HER, HE'D BROKEN HER HEART, AND NOW HE HAD TO SOMEHOW CONVINCE HER THAT IT HAD ALL BEEN AN ACT. IT WAS A STUPID IDEA THAT HE'D COME UP WITH TO BEGIN WITH, BUT HE WASN'T TOO CLEVER WHEN IT CAME TO BEING IN LOVE. IT HAD NEVER HAPPENED TO HIM BEFORE. HE'D BEEN IN LUST PLENTY OF TIMES, AND THAT WAS HOW THIS WHOLE AFFAIR WITH CHARLOTTE HAD BEGUN, BUT SHE WAS THE FIRST WOMAN TO EVER PROVE TO HIM THAT LOVE EXISTED. HE ADORED HER, AND HE SOMEHOW HAD TO PROVE THAT TO HER. MONEY HAD ALWAYS BOUGHT HIM WHAT HE WANTED, BUT HE KNEW IT WOULDN'T BUY HER. SHE WAS RICH, AND SHE WAS STUBBORN, AND HE WOULD HAVE TO GROVEL TO WIN HER BACK: IF THAT EVEN HAPPENED. HE WAS AN ASS AND HE KNEW IT. AS HE REACHED THE TOP LEVEL OF THE TOWER, HE GLANCED AROUND AND SAW HER. SHE WAS STANDING ALONE WITH A CROWD OF PEOPLE VIEWING OFF THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DECK, AND THE SIGHT OF HER TOOK HIS BREATH AWAY. FOR A MOMENT, HE STOOD SILENTLY TRYING TO RECOVER HIMSELF AS HE WATCHED HER WITHOUT SEEING HIM. ADMITTING HE WAS WRONG AND BEGGING WERE NOT TWO THINGS HE DID WELL OR OFTEN. HE WAS ASHAMED OF HIS BEHAVIOR AND HE DIDN'T BLAME HER FOR HATING HIS GUTS. HE HATED HIMSELF FOR HER. BEFORE HE COULD SPEAK, SHE TURNED AND SAW HIM, AND FOR A MOMENT, SHE LOOKED STUNNED. I love you. I love you so much it consumes me. HER WORDS RANG IN HIS EARS AS HE SAW HER BROWN EYES HARDEN AND SHE PLACED HER HANDS ON HER HIPS. SHE WAS ADORABLE AND IRASCIBLE WHEN SHE WAS ANGRY. HE WANTED TO SMILE, BUT HE KNEW THAT WOULD ONLY SPOIL HIS ATTEMPT TO WIN HER BACK. SHE WOULD ASSUME HE'D COME TO GLOAT OR SOMETHING, DESPITE THE FLOWERS AND CHOCOLATES IN HIS HANDS. CAN I HELP YOU? SHE HISSED AS SHE GLARED AT HIM. HIS HEART BEAT SO PAINFULLY IN HIS CHEST HE THOUGHT HE WOULD HAVE A HEART ATTACK, OR AT LEAST THE REST OF THE CITY COULD HEAR IT. HIS PAIN AT SEEING HER IN PAIN WAS SO VISCERAL, SURELY EVERYONE AROUND HIM COULD FEEL IT TOO. STEPPING TOWARD HER, HE GENTLY LAID THE FLOWERS DOWN ON THE GROUND AT HER FEET AS HE FELL DOWN ON ONE KNEE, LAYING THE CHOCOLATES SAFELY NEARBY. REACHING UP, HE TOOK ONE OF HER HANDS FROM HER HIP AND LOOKED UP INTO HER EYES. "I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IT CONSUMES ME, AND EVERYTHING I HAVE DONE IN THESE PAST FEW WEEKS I HAVE DONE FOR YOU." HIS WORDS ECHOED HER OWN THAT NIGHT TWO WEEKS AGO. AND IT WAS ALL TRUE. HE HAD LIED TO HER, BELIEVING IT WAS FOR HER OWN GOOD, BUT SVETLANA HAD PROVED OTHERWISE TO HIM. SHE HAD MADE HIM UNDERSTAND THAT CHARLOTTE REALLY DID LOVE HIM DESPITE THE FACT THAT HE WAS A ROYAL DOUCHEBAG FOR WHAT HE HAD DONE FOR HER. "I DON'T DESERVE YOUR FORGIVENESS, AND DAMN IT, I DON'T DESERVE YOU, BUT CHARLOTTE..." HE ROSE TO HIS FEET AND LOOKED DOWN AT HER NOW THAT HE WAS ONCE AGAIN A FEW INCHES TALLER THAN SHE WAS. "I HAVE NEVER BEEN IN LOVE WITH ANYONE BEFORE IN MY LIFE. I NEVER EVEN BELIEVED IN LOVE BEFORE I MET YOU, AND YOU TURNED MY WORLD AROUND. WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE, I'M JUST A WORTHLESS ASSHAT. I DON'T JUST WANT TO BE WITH YOU, I NEED TO BE WITH YOU." REACHING CAUTIOUSLY UP TO CUP HER CHEEK IN HIS HAND AS THE BRISK WIND ON TOP OF THE TOWER TOSSED THEIR HAIR AROUND, HE LOOKED DEEPLY INTO HER EYES, ALL OF THOSE EMOTIONS HE'D KEPT HIDDEN OVER THE PAST MONTHS SHOWING PLAINLY IN HIS ICE BLUE GAZE. "EVERYTHING I SAID AT THE PARTY WAS A LIE. I ADORE YOU, AND I ALWAYS WILL WHETHER YOU TELL ME YOU HATE ME AND THROW ME OFF OF THIS TOWER OR NOT." HE SMILED AT HER AND TOOK HER OTHER HAND IN HIS FREE HAND. BEHIND HIM, THE VIOLINIST WHO HAD BEEN SHADOWING HIM APPEARED AND THE NOTES STRAINED OUT BEAUTIFULLY ON THE WIND, ENVELOPING THEM WITH THEIR MAGIC. "PLEASE FORGIVE ME. I AM BEGGING YOU..." HE HAD MADE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL SAP OF HIMSELF, AND HE DIDN'T GIVE A DAMN. HE JUST HAD TO HAVE HER BACK EVEN IF IT MEANT HE MADE A FOOL OF HIMSELF. tag: charlotte word count: 1169 notes: sry it took longer than i expected! <3

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

Her hazel eyes took him in. He looked different, more stressed, and almost as though he had spent the last year drunk and stressed. Her heart, without warning, went out to him, telling her to be easy on him. There was obviously a reason he had come all the way to Paris for her. Hell, no one had ever done that before. Most people, besides her best friends, knew she loved Paris. Granted, her room at the penthouse had been decorated in a French theme, but people still didn’t understand. Yet here he was, standing in front of her, knowing her. Obviously Porter knew her better than she had originally thought, but her mind was still in control. It was telling her not to lose control, not to collapse and tell him she loved him still and most likely always would. In fact, it was telling her to get her act together and to get her ass down into the streets before to get lost in the crowd of French people. There was no way he could find her if she disappeared. There were millions of people walking through Paris, all she had to do was relocated to a different area or even a different country. She could easily disappear if she wanted to.

But Charlotte didn’t move. She drank in his eyes, his cheek bones, and his lean body. He was her heroine in a sense; she couldn’t live without seeing him, touching him, wanting him. Had she known that all those months ago, she would have stayed far away and never would have slept with him before. She didn’t want to feel like a desperate little girl, but she did anyways. That was the reality of the situation. Her eyes drank in the roses and what looked like to be a box of chocolate in his hand and, though she would never admit it, was slightly disappointed. Didn’t he realize she had better taste than just a box of chocolates and flowers? Her face, instead of breaking out into a grin just to see him, turned into a frown and she waited for an answer. Once his mouth opened and his husky voice escaped his lips, she felt herself melt into a pool of mush.

I love you. Those words alone made her heart sing. He loved her. He really loved her. He followed her all the way to Paris just to tell her he loved her. No man, in the history of men that weren’t in movies, had ever done that to her. But her mind suddenly took over. There was no way he could love her, no way in hell. He had told her that he pretended to love her to get what he wanted and that he had never loved her. Those words were harsh and were the reason she had relocated to a completely different country. They were the real reason. His voice continued, however, never letting her get a point in.

Of course he didn’t deserve her forgiveness. No one, after what she had found out, deserved her forgiveness. She was destined to be alone forever, and it was his entire fault. Porter had even admitted it. His hand crept up to her cheek and caressed it, and she felt herself leaning into his touch. No, she was letting her walls down. He had put those walls up, especially for him. Her heart continued to melt as he admitted that he had never been in love before and that he needed to be with her and that everything he had said all those weeks ago were a lie. A violinist appeared and the notes stranded together like a love song that had never been heard before. Ok, this had been what she expected when he first appeared.

Her eyes filled with tears as she looked into his desperate eyes. ”Do you realize what you’ve done? Like, really realized it?” she asked. ”You broke my heart into a million little pieces. You can’t just come waltzing up here, with a violinist and chocolates and flowers and expect me to just fall into your arms and love you again.” But, like a worthless liar, she found herself doing just that. ”You hurt me deep Porter, really deep. And I don’t know how I can ever get over that.”

In her mind, she knew she could try. It would take a while, and their relationship would be anything but perfect, but she was sure that she could try. There was no reason she couldn’t. Her heart and mind were being stubborn, but they knew she would cave. At least she wanted to be with him. And as her arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him into a searing kiss, she knew this was what she wanted. Nothing would ever be like this, nothing in her lifetime. Ophelia had unintentionally brought her daughter the greatest gift of all; love.

Love was a four letter word that meant everything. He had said those three words, those eight letters, and had still truly wanted her. As Charlotte pulled away, she stepped out of his grasp, a small smile toying on her lips. ”You came all the way to Paris just to tell me you loved me? That isn’t the Porter I know. I wonder if you could say it again, though. Or if you’re programed to only say it once a day.” a tinkling laugh escaped her lips. But her face grew serious. ”I can’t forgive you Porter, but we could work through it. I can never get over what you said, whether a lie or not, and I’ll have doubts about this relationship for a while. You are just going to have to realize that and try to overcome it. But, we can try.” There. Her mind, heart and stubbornness rested in peace as she let the three of them have control over her decision. Charlotte was not letting go too easily but she was also getting what she desperately wanted; her heroine.

you're too curious for your own good

template made by pan of caution 2.0

[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you "I KNOW I'VE BEEN AN ASS. I THOUGHT IF I CONVINCED YOU I DIDN'T LOVE YOU, THEN YOU COULD MOVE ON. BUT I COULDN'T CONVINCE MYSELF, THAT WAS THE PROBLEM, AND I HURT YOU IN THE PROCESS...." HE LOOKED INTO HER BROWN EYES AND ADMIRED HER BEAUTY IN THE DARKNESS WHICH HAD ENVELOPED THEM ON TOP OF THE TOWER. "I CAN NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF FOR WHAT I'VE DONE. I DON'T EXPECT YOU TO." HIS THUMB CARESSED THE SIDE OF HER FACE AS HE HELD HER FACE GENTLY IN HIS HANDS. WHEN SHE DEBATED WHETHER HE COULD SAY HE LOVED HER AGAIN, HE CHUCKLED AND RELEASED HER, TAKING A HOLD OF HER HANDS. "ARE YOU SAYING I'M LIKE A VAMPIRE, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF ONLY BEING ABLE TO CRY ONCE IN MY LIFE, I CAN ONLY SAY 'I LOVE YOU' ONCE A LIFETIME?" HE SMIRKED AT HER AND PULLED HER CLOSER TO HIM SO HE COULD FEEL THE HEAT ON HER BODY. LEANING IN TO HER EAR, HE WHISPERED SEDUCTIVELY IN HER EAR, "I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU." FOLLOWING HIS WORDS, SHE WRAPPED HER ARMS AROUND HIS NECK AND PULLED HIM AGAINST HER LIPS. THE KISS BURNED THROUGH THE FOG WHICH HAD SAT ON HIS MIND SINCE SHE'D WALKED AWAY FROM HIM A COUPLE WEEKS BEFORE. INSTINCTIVELY, HE WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND HER WAIST AND PULLED HER AGAINST HIM. HE NEEDED HER EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY. HE NEVER WANTED TO BE WITH ANYONE ELSE AGAIN, AND THAT WAS SAYING A LOT. PORTER HAD NEVER FOUND ONE WOMAN WHO SATISFIED HIM THE WAY CHARLOTTE DID. FROM THE MOMENT HE'D MET HER IN THE NIGHTCLUB AND THEY'D HAD SEX, HE'D NEVER BEEN THE SAME. SHE WAS ALIVE AND VIBRANT AND SEXY, AND HE WOULD NEVER FIND ANOTHER LIKE HER. HE HAD NO DESIRE TO NOW THAT HE HAD HER AGAIN. HE WANTED TO DIE AT HER SIDE EVEN IF HE FELT AWKWARD ADMITTING THAT. LEANING AWAY FROM HER, HE SMILED SLIGHTLY AND LOOKED INTO HER EYES AS SHE TOLD HIM SHE COULDN'T FORGIVE HIM FOR WHAT HE'D DONE. HE COULDN'T BLAME HER; HE COULDN'T FORGIVE HIMSELF. HE NEVER SHOULD HAVE SLEPT WITH SVETLANA, BUT HE'D BEEN TOO DENSE TO REALIZE THAT UNTIL AFTER IT WAS DONE. HE'D MANAGED TO HURT BOTH OF THEM IN THE PROCESS. AND HE COULDN'T FORGIVE HIMSELF FOR HURTING THE ONLY WOMAN HE WOULD EVER LOVE. IF HE EVER LOST CHARLOTTE, HE KNEW HE WOULD NOT BE A WHOLE MAN ANYMORE. LOOKING DOWN AT THEIR CLASPED HANDS, HE NODDED HIS HEAD IN UNDERSTANDING. "I DON'T BLAME YOU. I HOPE YOU CAN FORGIVE ME, BUT I KNOW WHY YOU CAN'T. I CAN'T FORGIVE MYSELF, SO I DON'T EXPECT ANY MORE OUT OF YOU." TAKING HER IN HIS ARMS, HE SLOWLY TURNED THEM AND POINTED OUT OVER THE REFLECTING LAKE WHICH RIPPLED SO FAR BELOW THEM. "BUT AT LEAST ENJOY THE FIREWORKS SHOW." SUDDENLY, LIGHT BURST INTO THE SKY, ILLUMINATING THE NIGHT IN BLUE AS THE FIRST FIREWORK EXPLODED OVER THE LAKE. THE TOURISTS WHO HAD BEEN ON THE OBSERVATION DECK WHEN PORTER HAD ARRIVED HAD LONG DISAPPEARED, LEAVING THEM ALONE WITH ONLY THE VIOLINIST WHO OBEDIENTLY WENT THROUGH HIS REPERTOIRE OF LOVE SONGS. MORE FIREWORKS FOLLOWED THE FIRST ONE, TURNING THE SKY INTO VIBRANT SHADES OF RED AND GOLD AND PURPLE AND BLUE. PORTER TURNED TO WATCH CHARLOTTE'S FACE AS THE EXPLOSIONS LIT UP HER EYES. HE LEANED OVER AND KISSED HER SOFTLY ON HER CHEEK, HOLDING HER AS IF HE MAY LOSE HER AT ANY MOMENT. AFTER ABOUT A TEN MINUTE DISPLAY JUST FOR HER, THE FIREWORKS ENDED, AND PORTER SILENTLY TOOK HER HAND. HE LED HER OUT OF THE TOWER - A WALK AND ELEVATOR RIDE WHICH WAS FAR TOO LONG FOR HIS TASTE - AND OPENED THE DOOR OF THE WAITING LIMO FOR HER TO CLIMB IN. DIRECTING THE DRIVER TO HER HOTEL, HE GENTLY REACHED OVER AND HELD HER HAND, GLANCING AT HER OUT OF THE SIDE OF HIS VISION AND OFFERING HER A SMILE. SHE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL, AND HE WASN'T SURE HE'D EVER BE ABLE TO FIND THE COURAGE TO TELL HER EVERYTHING HE FELT FOR HER, BUT IT WELLED UP INSIDE OF HIM AND FILLED HIM COMPLETELY AT ALL TIMES. SO THIS WAS WHAT LOVE FELT LIKE. HE'D NEVER BELIEVED IN IT BEFORE CHARLOTTE, AND NOW HE FELT SO FULL IN COMPARISON TO HOW EMPTY HIS LIFE HAD BEEN BEFORE. HIS FATHER HAD FORCED HIM TO BE WITH HER, BUT NOW IT WAS HIS CHOICE. AND NOW HE HAD THE STRENGTH TO TELL HIS FATHER WHERE HE COULD STICK HIS OPINION. "WHEN WE GET BACK TO SAPPHIRE BAY, WILL YOU STAY IN THE LOFT WITH ME?" HE ASKED, HIS VOICE SMALL AND UNLIKE HIM. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE, IT MATTERED TO HIM IF SOMEONE TOLD HIM NO. SLIDING CLOSER TO HER ACROSS THE SEAT, HE LEANED OVER UNTIL HIS FOREHEAD WAS TOUCHING HERS. SLOWLY, HE REACHED UP AND TOUCHED HER CHIN, PULLING HER LIPS UP TO TOUCH HIS. HE DIDN'T WANT THERE TO BE ANY WALLS BETWEEN THEM, AND HE WANTED HER, BUT HE DOUBTED SHE WANTED HIM THAT WAY YET. HE WOULD HAVE TO MAKE HIMSELF WAIT AND ALLOW HER TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE. THE KISS WAS SWEET AND IT COMMUNICATED HIS DESIRE FOR HER WITHOUT BEING PUSHY. HE HAD ALWAYS WANTED HER FROM THE MOMENT THEY'D CONNECTED IN THE NIGHTCLUB, AND HE DIDN'T WANT ANOTHER WOMAN'S TOUCH. HE WAS A KEPT MAN. THE THOUGHT MADE HIM SMILE AS HE PULLED AWAY FROM HER AND TUCKED A STRAND OF HER BROWN HAIR OVER HER EAR. tag: charlotte word count: 939 notes: <333

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

”Well, you convinced me. Why couldn’t you just accept the fact that I love you and that we could be happy? That maybe, you know, your father did something right when forcing us together. That maybe fate has brought us together. But no, you hurt me” A sigh escaped her lips as she realized that this would be another argument that would be fought multiple times. He could not expect her to forget the hurt and lies that he had committed; it would forever haunt her and doubt her. She blinked and realized that time had passed between them and it was falling into twilight, her favorite time of day. Not because of the vampires that supposedly had a book called the very name, but because it was just so elegant and pretty. There were no words to describe this time of night. Their bodies were so close, almost entangled and she let out a little giggle. ”I didn’t know vampires could only cry once.” Charlotte whispered as she heard the three words echo again and again in her ear.

This was love. There was no other word for this. Their kiss was hot and heavy, just like the two of them, and for a moment, Charlotte had forgotten what it was like before he kissed her. She had never quiet had it just like this, and when they had had their first moment of passion, she had never been the say. Porter had actually wanted her, had actually needed her, and the sky is the limit now. There was nothing that would bring her down now that she was with him. Her mother would approve, his father would approve, and she could convince her friends. But Charlotte knew she was weak when it came to him. Most guys would have to work to have her again, but he came and swooped in, taking her into his arms. There was no way she could ever deny him again in her life. It would break her, break him, and just end her life. He was her heroine and she needed her shot every second of every day.

His voice broke the silence and she nodded, glad that he accepted the truth. But his next words made her turn and gasp as lights exploded from behind. Designs busted into the air and she continue gasp and blink and take everything in. Obviously he had come to Paris, planning on wooing her and not taking no for an answer. Reds and gold colors continued to burst and she gave a girlish laugh as the show ended. Silence echoed suddenly and she felt his lips brush against her cheek. Her body leaned against him, the heat between the two undeniable.

Their hands intertwined and he pulled her down the stairs and into the elevator before the two reached the grounds of Paris. A laugh escaped her lips as she rushed to keep up with his eager step. Quickly following him into the limo, she slid over, allowing room for him. Charlotte returned the smile and rested her head on his shoulder. He was everything she wanted and hated, but rolled into the perfect human being. His voice broke the silence, tiny and insecure, which was so unlike him. Charlotte was taken aback by the insecurities that it took her a moment to answer. Her body rolled onto his as her legs wrapped around his waist, her dress slowly piling around her hips. ”Of course. I believe, now that we’ll be sharing the same room, we have some redecorating to do.” her voice was soft before her lips found his neck and slowly made their way to his lips. Lust slowly began to build in her veins and she knew that the next couple of hours would be the most intense moments of her life.

Her hands snuck their way under his shirt and traced his muscles as her lips found his and their tongues battled for dominance. Her hands unbuttoned the shirt and pushed it aside before finding their way to his hair and pulling him close to her. His hands felt like fire against her smooth porcelain skin and she felt as though she would surely combust. But she pulled away before it could get any more heated on her part and brought her lips to his ear. ”Do you have any other surprises or no? Because, I’m afraid, if you don’t, I may just lose control right here, right now.” A small smirk toyed with her lips as she let her hands fall gently on his shoulders, waiting for an answer.

you're too curious for your own good

template made by pan of caution 2.0

[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you PORTER MIDDLETON HAD VERY RARELY BEEN HONEST. NOT THAT HE WAS A LIAR, BECAUSE TYPICALLY HE WAS NOT, BUT HE WAS VERY SELDOM ALL-OUT, BRUTALLY HONEST WITH ANYONE EITHER. LIKE MOST MEN, HE KEPT HIS EMOTIONS WELL-HIDDEN, AND CHARLOTTE HAD BEEN NO EXCEPTION TO THAT RULE. HE'D NEVER TOLD HER THAT HE HATED HIS FATHER FOR FORCING HIM TO GET ENGAGED - EVEN THOUGH HE'D COME TO FIND LATER THAT HE TRULY WANTED HER - AND HE'D NEVER TOLD HER THAT IT HAD NEVER BEEN HER HE HATED. HE'D HELD IT AGAINST HER BECAUSE HE COULDN'T LASH OUT AT HIS FATHER LIKE HE SHOULD HAVE DONE. BUT NOW, THAT HE KNEW SHE LOVED HIM AND HE WAS ABLE TO BE STRONG ENOUGH TO TELL HER HE ADORED HER, HE KNEW HE COULD TELL HIS FATHER THE TRUTH. YES, HE WANTED TO BE MARRIED TO CHARLOTTE WHEN THEY WERE BOTH READY, BUT IT WOULD BE ON THEIR OWN TIME AND HE WASN'T GOING TO LISTEN TO HIS FATHER'S BOSSINESS ANY LONGER. HE WOULD DO WHAT HE WANTED TO DO WHEN HE WANTED TO DO IT, AND THAT WAS THAT. HE FELT FREE FROM HIS FATHER'S OVERBEARING CONTROL ALREADY, AND IT WASN'T MERELY BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T EVEN ON THE SAME CONTINENT. PORTER NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED TWO WEEKS AGO THAT HAPPINESS COULD RETURN TO HIM AGAIN. HE'D ALSO NEVER IMAGINED THAT HE COULD BE THIS HAPPY. HE WAS USED TO LIVING A MEDIOCRE, PLEASANT EXISTENCE WHERE HE COULD BUY HIS HAPPINESS AND IT ONLY LASTED A FEW DAYS, OR HOURS, AT BEST. BUT WHAT HE FELT HERE AND NOW WITH CHARLOTTE AS HER HAND SLIPPED INTO HIS AS THEY RAN TO THE LIMO, AS HE HEARD HER GIGGLING LAUGH AT THE SIGHT OF THE FIREWORKS HE'D PREPARED JUST FOR HER... THERE WAS NOTHING LIKE THIS. HE'D NEVER IMAGINED HE WOULD BE THE TYPE OF MAN WHO WOULD WANT A WIFE AND CHILDREN AND ALL OF THOSE THINGS, BUT HE WANTED ALL OF THAT AND MORE WITH CHARLOTTE. HIS MONEY, WHICH HAD ONCE ONLY BEEN TO PROVIDE HIS OWN PLEASURE, COULD NOW PROVIDE PLEASURE FOR HER. HE WANTED TO GIVE HER EVERYTHING, AND ALTHOUGH HE KNEW HE COULD NEVER MAKE UP FOR THE WRONGS HE HAD DONE TO HER, HE WOULD DO EVERYTHING IN HIS POWER TO TRY. HE WATCHED HER WITH HIS ICE BLUE EYES AS SHE SEEMED TO PONDER HIS SINCERE QUESTION. THEY'D ORIGINALLY BEEN FORCED INTO LIVING TOGETHER DUE TO THE ARRANGEMENT THEIR PARENTS HAD SET UP, BUT NOW (ON HIS NEWFOUND FREEDOM KICK) HE WANTED HER TO LIVE WITH HIM BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO. PART OF HIM - THE REBELLIOUS PART - DIDN'T WANT TO FOLLOW IN THE SAME PATH THEIR PARENTS WANTED, BUT HE WANTED HER TOO BADLY TO CARE IF HIS FATHER AND HER MOTHER JUST SO HAPPENED TO WANT THE SAME THING. THE LOFT WAS OFFICIALLY HIS, ONE OF THE PROPERTIES HE OWNED IN ADDITION TO THE VELVET REVOLVER BURLESQUE CLUB, SO HE WOULD BE LIVING THERE ALONE IF CHARLOTTE WASN'T WITH HIM. AND NOW, HE HAD NO DESIRE TO LIVE THERE ALONE. HE COULD IMAGINE HIMSELF RETURNING DEJECTEDLY TO SEE THE PHOTOGRAPHS AND PAINTINGS OF PARIS IN HER BEDROOM, AND THE THOUGHT SENT A CHILL DOWN HIS SPINE. SLOWLY, CHARLOTTE SLID TOWARD HIM, SLIDING ONTO HIS LAP EASILY AS HE MOVED SO SHE COULD SETTLE ON TOP OF HIM. DAMN. SHE WASN'T MAKING THIS EASY ON HIM. "YOU CAN DECORATE IT WITH DEER ANTLERS FOR ALL I GIVE A DAMN, AS LONG AS YOU'RE THERE." HE SMILED SLIGHTLY, HIS HANDS INSTINCTIVELY MADE THEIR WAY TO HER SLENDER HIPS, AND HE WATCHED AS HER DRESS CONVENIENTLY SLID ASIDE, FALLING OVER THEIR LEGS AS SHE STRADDLED HIM. THE IMAGE WAS SO SEXY AND ALLURING, HE HAD TO FORCE HIMSELF TO SWALLOW FOR FEAR HE WOULD TAKE HER RIGHT THEN. SHE TEASED HIM, UNBUTTONING HIS SHIRT SLOWLY... TANTALIZINGLY... AND HER COOL HANDS TOUCHED HIS SKIN, MAKING HIM FEEL AS IF HE WAS BEING BURNED SLOWLY BY DRY ICE. HE SLID HIS HANDS UP HER THIGHS, HIS FINGERS MOLTEN AGAINST HER COOL PORCELAIN LEGS. HER FINGERS LACED INTO HIS HAIR, AND HE RELEASED A BREATH OF DESIRE AS SHE FURTHER TEASED HIM BY LEANING OVER AND WHISPERING INTO HIS EAR. HE MANAGED TO GET A HOLD ON HIMSELF AS SHE LEANED FORWARD AND WHISPERED, ASKING HIM IF HE HAD ANY FURTHER SECRETS TO SHARE WITH HER. LOOKING UP INTO HER EYES, HE KNEW HE WOULD NEVER LIE TO HER AGAIN. WHETHER HE WAS PHYSICALLY ABLE TO OR NOT WAS A QUESTION STILL TO BE ANSWERED, BUT HE KNEW HE DIDN'T HAVE THE HEART TO. WHILE HE MAY BE HEARTLESS TO OTHER PEOPLE OR HAVE A BAD DAY AND TELL SOMEONE TO FUCK OFF, HE WOULD NEVER BREAK CHARLOTTE'S HEART AGAIN, EVEN IF HE DIED TRYING TO KEEP HER HAPPY. HE WANTED NOTHING MORE THAN TO HAVE HER EVERY DAY FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: SHE WAS, AS SHE HAD BEEN FROM THAT NIGHT IN THE CLUB, HIS ADDICTION. HE WOULD SOAK HER UP LIKE A FISH SOAKS UP WATER AND BEGS FOR MORE WHEN ITS BEEN THROWN ON THE SAND. HE WOULD SUFFOCATE WITHOUT HER NEARNESS. HIS FINGERTIPS DUG INTO THE SKIN ON HER THIGHS, AND HE RAISED HIS HIPS SLIGHTLY TO PRESS THEIR HIPS TIGHTLY TOGETHER AS HE LEANED UP TO TOUCH HIS LIPS GENTLY TO HERS, WITHOUT ACTUALLY KISSING HER. "I HAVE ONE MORE SURPRISE FOR YOU, ACTUALLY," HE ADMITTED, RAISING AN EYEBROW AND PULLING BACK FROM THE ALMOST-KISS BEFORE SHE COULD KISS HIM BACK. LEANING TO THE SIDE, HE OPENED A COMPARTMENT IN THE LIMO DOOR AND WITHDREW A SMALL BLACK JEWELRY BOX. THIS BOX WAS DIFFERENT FROM THE FIRST BOX HE'D PRESENTED HER. ALTHOUGH IT ALSO HELD A RING, IT WAS A RING HE'D ACTUALLY GONE TO THE TROUBLE TO FIND HIMSELF. HE'D PAID A VISIT TO HIS MOTHER IN LOS ANGELES BEFORE COMING TO PARIS, AND HE'D ASKED HER ABOUT HIS GRANDMOTHER'S RING. HIS GRANDMOTHER (HIS MOTHER'S MOTHER) HAD BEEN A STRONG-WILLED, INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO HAD LOVED HER HUSBAND DEEPLY AND GIVEN EVERYTHING SHE HAD TO TAKE CARE OF HER FAMILY. PORTER'S MOTHER WAS VERY MUCH LIKE HER MOTHER, AND HE'D ALWAYS BEEN CLOSER TO HIS MOTHER THAN HIS FATHER. ALTHOUGH HIS PARENTS WEREN'T DIVORCED, HIS MOTHER HAD LONG AGO GIVEN UP TRYING TO LOVE HIS FATHER, SO THE TWO LIVED IN SEPARATE CITIES WHERE THEY WERE THE HAPPIEST. HIS MOTHER OFTEN WENT TO VISIT HER MOTHER, UNTIL THE OLDER WOMAN HAD DIED. ON HER DEATHBED, PORTER'S GRANDMOTHER HAD SWORN TO HER DAUGHTER THAT SHE WANTED PORTER - OUT OF ALL OF THE GRANDCHILDREN - TO HAVE HER RING TO GIVE TO THE WOMAN HE LOVED ONCE THAT WOMAN CAME AROUND. PORTER HAD KNOWN THIS SINCE HE WAS A TEENAGER, BUT HE'D NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE, AND SO HE'D BASICALLY IGNORED THE WISH. HOWEVER, HIS GRANDMOTHER HAD KNOWN HIM - AND FATE - BETTER THAN HE HAD KNOWN HIMSELF. SHE SAW THE POTENTIAL FOR GREAT LOVE WITHIN HER FAVORITE GRANDSON, AND SHE'D INSURED HE WOULD HAVE THE TOOLS AVAILABLE WHEN THE TIME CAME. AND THAT TIME HAD COME. OPENING THE BOX, HE SHOWED CHARLOTTE THE RING. IT WAS A RING THAT WAS SOLELY HIM AND NOTHING TO DO WITH EITHER OF THEIR PARENTS. IT WAS RELATIVELY SIMPLE COMPARED TO WHAT MOST PEOPLE OF THEIR CASTE AND AGE GROUP HAD, BUT PORTER THOUGHT IT WAS PERFECT FOR THE ONLY WOMAN HE WOULD EVER LOVE. WHEN HE SAW IT, HE REMEMBERED HIS GRANDMOTHER AND HER STRENGTH, HER PRIDE, AND HER STRONG WILL, AND HE KNEW CHARLOTTE WAS THE ONLY WOMAN WHO WOULD EVER DESERVE TO WEAR HIS GRANDMOTHER'S RING. "IT BELONGED TO MY MOTHER'S MOTHER. SHE LEFT IT TO ME BECAUSE SHE WAS SMARTER THAN I AM, AND SHE KNEW I WOULD FIND YOU SOME DAY." HIS VOICE CAUGHT IN HIS THROAT, AND HE PULLED THE RING OUT OF THE BOX, GENTLY TAKING HER HAND AND SLIDING IT ONTO HER SLENDER FINGER. LOOKING UP INTO HER CHOCOLATE BROWN EYES, HE OFFERED HER A HANDSOME SMILE. "WILL YOU MARRY ME, CHARLOTTE? FOR REAL THIS TIME? NOT BECAUSE OUR PARENTS WANT US TO, BUT BECAUSE WE WANT TO. BECAUSE I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU, AND I WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, AND MINE, WITH YOU." REACHING UP WITH ONE HAND, HE PULLED HER FACE DOWN TO HIM AND HE KISSED HER PASSIONATELY, DESPERATELY. HIS OTHER HAND GRIPPED HER THIGH, BENEATH HER DRESS. "YOU DON'T HAVE TO CONTROL YOURSELF WITH ME," HE WHISPERED LUSTILY TO HER, PULLING HER DOWN BENEATH HIM ON THE SEAT. THANKFULLY, HIS DRIVER KNEW HIS MASTER, AND HE KNEW WHEN TO JUST KEEP DRIVING. WHEN THE WINDOW BEHIND HIS HEAD WAS LOCKED, HE KNEW NOT TO STOP FOR ANYTHING. PORTER PULLED HER DRESS OFF AND KISSED DOWN HER STOMACH, MAKING THE MOMENT LAST EVEN THOUGH HE WANTED IT OVER WITH AT THE SAME TIME. EVEN THAT TIME IN THE KITCHEN, THE FIRST TIME THEY'D EVER REALLY BONDED, HE HADN'T MADE LOVE TO HER, AND THIS TIME WOULD BE DIFFERENT. HE WAS PASSIONATELY IN LOVE WITH HER, AND HE HAD TO PROVE IT TO HER. "I LOVE YOU, CHARLOTTE," HE WHISPERED HOTLY INTO HER EAR AS THEY ROLLED TOGETHER IN THE BACKSEAT OF HIS LIMO. tag: charlotte word count: 1551 notes: AAAAAAAACK! best post evar!

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

Happiness. Love. Content. Excitement. All of those adjectives and more were the emotions threatening to burst the seams off of Charlotte. She had never felt all of these emotions mixed at once and she knew she would never feel the same way again. There was no other man she had ever loved like this. There would never be an exception. Porter would be the only one who could make her melt into the palm of his hand, the only one who could make her laugh, cry, smile and die. He controlled the upper hand, whether she would ever admit that aloud or not. He controlled everything about her except her mind, and even that was barely controlled by herself. Charlotte had never hated him, not even from the beginning; she had only hated the idea of him. And considering he had just chased her half way across the world, she was sure that he had only hated the idea of her. There was no way he would have done the things he had done if he had hated her, even for a brief moment in the past. Love and lust were the two strongest feelings a human could have in her mind, and luckily for her, the two had had that from the beginning.

Had anyone asked her months ago if she would be in love with Porter Middleton, she would have surely laughed in their face before declaring that he was an abominable prat. Now, however, she would blush and giggle and ignore the question until it became painfully obvious what the answer was. And that was how Charlotte wanted it. There was no reason she had to hide who she really was and who she really loved. By denying everything that made her her, she would be going against the very principals that she had created when she was seven. And because she and Porter were new lovers and new members of destiny, she had much to learn about him. Hell, she didn’t even know what his favorite color was and that was an important fact. Charlotte couldn’t go through life without knowing every little detail about the man she loved and eventually wanted to marry. Yes, marry. Ophelia and Andrew would be pleased about the true emotions brewing between the two, but Charlotte wanted Porter for everything he wasn’t. He wasn’t like his father, wasn’t like anyone she had ever met before, and that was what she had wanted.

Their loft would be redecorated the way she wanted it and not the way she deemed necessary when sharing it with another human she did not like. The kitchen and bedrooms would be repainted, and Charlotte knew exactly what the guest room would become. Of course, she would not mention the truth and the idea forming in her mind for quite a while, knowing that any mention of an additional human being to the family would surely scare Porter away. It had taken forever just for the two to learn to love each other, and if she added another human into the equation, it would damage their relationship as newly lovers. And a damage that server would kill her, inside and out. Without Porter, it would be a year without rain, a year without Santa Claus, a year without chocolate chip cookies and every other cliché thing she could think about.

His fingers became part of her body and she shivered under the cool touch of his talented hands. Her hands made their way down his body at a slow pace before she brought them back to his hair and bringing his lips towards her for a searing kiss. Charlotte made her legs wrap around him tightly and prayed that when she asked if there was anything else to the night, he would say no. Of course, he was a man and would probably say yes, but she could make him wait. She wanted him and needed him now and there was no way she was going to sit on his lap like a good little girl and get her present whenever he damn felt like it. But like she predicted, he mentioned that there was another gift as he leaned in closer. Her lips parted like the Red Sea, only to be denied and teased by the man she loved more than air. A pout began to tease the edges of her lips and Charlotte almost rolled off of his lap and kept herself in the corner of the limo until she noticed the velvet box. Suddenly, her ring finger felt quiet empty since the moment she had taken the previous engagement ring off. And as he opened the box, her voice was suddenly lost and tears bloomed her eyes. He couldn’t mean what he was implying; they had just gotten back together. But as she looked at the box and studied the outline of the diamond ring, she knew this was everything. He wasn’t teasing her; he really wanted the wedding to happen. And just this thought alone, without his words or questions, she knew would be enough to make her say yes on the spot. Their love, she was sure, could withstand any obstacle if he was willing to take a leap of fate and marry her, something he had said he would never do. Then again, he had also mentioned how he didn’t believe in love.

The ring appeared on her finger and she watched as the light caught the pure diamond. It would never leave her body; never leave her sight, unless it was pried from her cold dead body. His grandmother’s ring shined from her finger and she felt tears of happiness trail down her cheek. It was the definition of perfection. As Porter asked her to marry him with more passion than their first true encounter, her mouth opened but nothing came out. Charlotte was, for the first time, speechless. There was no thought crossing her mind, no words willing to burst out of her lips and she wished there was something she could say that would be just as powerful as the feelings inside of her. ”Yes. I will. I do. I shall. I need to. I love you. I want you. I need you!” the words came out like a river pouring out her mouth, jumbling up together in what she was sure was not a coherent thought or sentence. But it would have to do because she brought him in for another kiss.

As she was guided to the seat, her dress suddenly ending up on the floor, she wondered how she could have gotten this lucky. ”I wasn’t planning on it. Better hold on tight, cowboy, because you’re about to have the ride of your life” and she meant it, not only in a sexual way, but in a pleasurable way. There would be no going back. Charlotte would not fail this marriage and she would not let Porter quit on her now. There was no way she was going to allow that to happen. For the first time, they had made love. As the limo made its way down the crowded streets of Paris, Charlotte was certain there was no greater joy.

Hours later, she found herself naked and intertwined in sheets at the penthouse, her head on Porter’s chest and the shades open just enough to overlook the Eiffel Tower. Charlotte’s body was covered in a thin layer of sweat, but as her eyes studied the ring on her finger, it didn’t matter. ”Obviously your grandmother had good taste in jewelry”

you're too curious for your own good

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[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you LAYING ON THE SILK SHEETS IN CHARLOTTE'S PENTHOUSE, PORTER GAZED OUT THE WINDOW AT THE EIFFEL TOWER ILLUMINATED IN THE DARKNESS, WHEN HE WASN'T WATCHING CHARLOTTE SLEEP. HE'D HEARD ONCE THAT IF YOU TRULY LOVED SOMEONE, YOU WOULD BE CONTENT TO SIT AND JUST WATCH THEM SLEEP. SHE'D ONLY BEEN NAPPING FOR A LITTLE WHILE, BUT SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL AS SHE SIGHED CONTENTEDLY AGAINST HIS CHEST. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE, PORTER DIDN'T REGRET HIS ACTIONS. EVERYTHING ABOUT CHARLOTTE WAS RIGHT. HE WOULD PROBABLY NEVER DESERVE HER, BUT SHE MADE HIM A BETTER PERSON. HE WANTED TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT HER THE WAY HE KNEW EVERY CURVE OF HER BODY. HE COULD NEVER IMAGINE BECOMING BORED WITH HER, AND HE HOPED SHE WOULD NEVER GROW TIRED OF HIM. THE PASSION HE FELT JUST WHEN HE LOOKED AT HER (NOT TO MENTION WHEN THEY MADE LOVE) OVERWHELMED HIM. HE'D HAD SEX BEFORE, BUT HE'D NEVER EXPERIENCED THE SORT OF ECSTASY HE FELT WHEN HE WAS WITH HER. AND NOW SHE WAS HIS. SHE'D ACTUALLY SAID YES WHEN HE'D ASKED HER TO MARRY HIM. SMILING TO HIMSELF, HE LOOKED AWAY FROM THE TOWER AND DOWN AT HER, JUST TO REALIZE SHE'D WOKEN UP AND WAS ADMIRING HER ENGAGEMENT RING. Obviously your grandmother had good taste in jewelry, SHE COMMENTED. SMILING, HE LIFTED HIS FREE HAND AND GENTLY TOOK HER FINGERS IN HIS TO LOOK AT THE RING ON HER HAND. IT SPARKLED IN THE LIGHT, AND HE WAS HAPPY THAT IT FIT HER SO WELL. NOT ONLY PHYSICALLY, BUT THE RING FIT HER PERSONALITY. HE WAS THANKFUL HIS GRANDMOTHER HAD KNOWN HIM BETTER THAN HIMSELF, JUST AS HE SUSPECTED CHARLOTTE WOULD COME TO KNOW HIM BETTER THAN ANYONE. "SHE KNEW I WOULD FALL IN LOVE WITH A WOMAN LIKE HER. SHE TOLD ME AS MUCH. 'BOY, YOU COULD NEVER BE WITH A WEAK GIRL. SHE'D HAVE TO HAVE A BACKBONE SO SHE COULD TELL YOU WHEN TO KISS HER ASS AND WHEN TO GROVEL AT HER FEET'." HE CHUCKLED AT THE MEMORY. HIS GRANDMOTHER HAD BEEN A HARDY, STRONG WOMAN, MUCH LIKE HIS OWN MOTHER. "IT LOOKS GOOD ON YOU," HE COMMENTED, SPREADING HIS FINGERS AND INTWINING THEM BETWEEN HERS. TURNING HIS HEAD, HE KISSED THE TOP OF HER HEAD AND HUGGED HER AGAINST HIS SIDE. FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER SLEEPING WITH A WOMAN, HE HAD NO DESIRE TO GET UP FROM THE BED. THE LAST TIME HE'D BEEN WITH CHARLOTTE, HE'D RUN, BUT NOW HE DIDN'T WANT TO RUN ANYMORE. EVEN IF HE WASN'T STRONG ENOUGH TO STAND UP FOR HIMSELF, HE WOULD PROTECT HER. "I HAVE TO ADMIT, I'M NOT GOOD AT THE PILLOWTALK THING. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TEACH ME," HE ADMITTED, SMILING AS HE MOVED SO HE WAS LAYING NEXT TO HER LOOKING AT HER. BRUSHING HER DAMP BROWN HAIR BEHIND HER EAR, HE RAN HIS FINGER DOWN HER CHEST, TEASING THE TOP OF THE SHEET WHERE IT RESTED OVER HER. THE THOUGHT OF THIS MOMENT, THIS TIME WITH JUST THE TWO OF THEM, ENDING WAS DREAD TO HIM. EVENTUALLY, HOWEVER, THEY WOULD HAVE TO RETURN TO SAPPHIRE BAY AND TO THEIR PARENTS AND TO THE PUBLIC ALWAYS WATCHING THEM. THIS TIME, THEY WOULD BE DOING IT TOGETHER, BUT IT STILL WOULDN'T BE EASY. HE ALSO KNEW HE DIDN'T WANT HER HATING SVETLANA FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE, BUT HE WOULDN'T BRING IT UP NOW. IT WAS TOO SOON, AND HE KNEW IT. HE HAD TO PROVE TO HER THAT SHE WAS THE ONLY WOMAN HE WOULD EVER BE IN LOVE WITH BEFORE HE COULD ADVISE HER TO FORGIVE HER BEST FRIEND. SITTING UP, HE REACHED FOR THE ROOM SERVICE TRAY SITUATED AT THE FOOT OF THE BED AND STABBED A STRAWBERRY ON THE END OF ONE OF THE FONDUE SPIKES BEFORE DIPPING IT IN THE CHOCOLATE FONDUE FOUNTAIN INCLUDED ON THE TABLE. MONEY AFFORDED HIM ANYTHING HE WANTED, AND THAT INCLUDED CHARLOTTE'S DESIRES NOW. IF SHE WANTED ALL OF THE FONDUE IN THE WORLD, HE WOULD GIVE IT TO HER. WITH HIS FREE HAND, HE STABBED ANOTHER STRAWBERRY WITH ONE SPIKE AND A PIECE OF BREAD WITH THE OTHER, AND LAID BACK DOWN NEXT TO CHARLOTTE. OFFERING THE SECOND STRAWBERRY AND THE BREAD, HE SMILED AT HER. "STRAWBERRY OR BREAD?" HE ASKED AS HE BIT HIS OWN FRUIT OFF OF ITS SPIKE AND SUCKED ON IT BEFORE SWALLOWING. tag: charlotte word count: 736 notes: whoo hoo for girly-surprises! bahaha

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

Obviously women knew the men best. Just as Porter’s grandmother had known her grandson perfectly, Charlotte was sure she would know everything about Porter as time continued. They had all the time in the world, and she was content with that. There was no part of her that would surely get bored with the man who continued to surprise and tease her. ”I can kick your ass. If not, I can hire someone to kick your ass. “ she mentioned calmly, as though she was talking about the weather. As their fingers intertwined, she sighed contently and allowed herself to get as close as possible to him. They were spooning, something she never imagined that Porter Middleton would willingly do. The last time they had gotten even close to this he had run away and that would become her biggest fear. There was nothing Porter could do about it; his past would haunt her, just like she was sure her past haunted him. He had to know about her ex-fiancé and her bulimia, whether she had mentioned it or the press had. Charlotte was sure of it. There was so much she wished she could tell him, explain to him, but she couldn’t. There were no words to truly get across her deepest secrets, fears and regrets. Eventually, the words would come to her, but until then, she was content.

”It’s really not that hard. You just have to say something and I respond. We’re already doing it” she whispered before gasping as his cold fingers teased her bare skin. For the moment, they were alone and there was no one that could bother them. Eventually people would find them and Charlotte knew she would have to return home to her parents and friends and newly formed enemies, but until then, she was going to have fun. Everything right now was about her and Porter and fixing and creating a stable relationship. It would not be easy, but that was alright, Charlotte would stick around. His hands continued to tease her and she rolled on top of him, pinning his arms above his head. ”Don’t do that” she whispered, as hair fell in front of her face ”I need time to recharge” but her lips met his just for a moment and she knew she could go for another round. Right now, however, there was something in the pit of her stomach that was bothering her.

Charlotte rolled off of him before sitting up and watching his lean body reach across to the food tray. The smell of food made its way up her nose and her stomach rolled. There was no reason to get sick, it was only breakfast food. But as Porter offered her the strawberry and bread, she quickly rolled out of the bed and ran into the bathroom, where her stomach emptied its contents into the toilet bowl. Tears perked her eyes as a wave of embarrassment and confusion surrounded her. This had been happening for a week or so, her unable to keep food down in her stomach. Charlotte knew it wasn’t because she was relapsing, but it was something else. And in the back of her mind, she knew exactly what it was. Yet the words could not form and there was no way she was going to mention it to Porter.

The dates added up, though. Almost a month and a half ago she and Porter had slept together without protection, the night he had cheated, and now she was sick. It had to be related. There was no way it wasn’t. Charlotte had seen girls go through this and she knew the truth; she was pregnant. Excitement riffled through her stomach, but she needed the test. And Porter…well, she couldn’t hide such a secret. This involved him. Standing up in the bathroom, she leaned over the sink and looked at her reflection before beginning to brush her teeth. A pale and scared face had looked back and she knew the truth. As Charlotte spit the remainders of the toothpaste into the sink, she sighed. ”Too much physical activity” she said, giving Porter a small smile. No, she wasn’t going to tell him right now. Not this soon. When he fell asleep she would go downstairs and get a test. When he wasn’t around her, she would. Until then, there would be no alcohol and nothing that would upset her stomach. ”I’m not very hungry right now”

you're too curious for your own good

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[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you "SO I DON'T SUCK AS MUCH AT PILLOWTALK AS I THOUGHT I WOULD," HE COMMENTED, CHUCKLING AS HE TWISTED A STRAND OF HER BROWN HAIR AROUND HIS FINGER. HE SMILED PLAYFULLY AS SHE GASPED AT HIS TOUCH ON HER CHEST. AS CHARLOTTE TWISTED HIM AND PINNED HIS HANDS OVER HIS HEAD, HE RAISED AN EYEBROW AND SMILED MISCHIEVIOUSLY AT HER. HE INSTANTLY LOST ALL HINTS OF EXHAUSTION WHEN SHE DID THINGS LIKE THAT, AND HIS BODY REACTED INSTANTLY. UNLIKE ANY WOMAN BEFORE HER, CHARLOTTE MADE HIS BODY DO THINGS BEYOND HIS CONTROL. HE ALWAYS WANTED HER, NO MATTER HOW TIRED HE WAS. "I REALLY WISH YOU WOULDN'T GET ME ALL EXCITED AND THEN LEAVE ME HANGING. THAT DOES EVIL THINGS TO A MAN, YOU KNOW." HE POUTED PLAYFULLY WHEN SHE KISSED HIM AND THEN ROLLED OFF. SITTING UP, HE RETRIEVED THE FOOD TO OFFER TO HER. ALMOST INSTANTLY, SHE SEEMED TO GAG AND RACED FOR THE BATHROOM WITH NOTHING BUT THE SHEET WRAPPED AROUND HER BEAUTIFUL, SLENDER FRAME. HAVING GROWN UP IN THE SAME SOCIAL CIRCLES, PORTER KNEW SOME THINGS ABOUT CHARLOTTE'S LIFE BEFORE HE'D KNOWN HER. HE VAGUELY REMEMBERED DETAILS HE'D READ ABOUT HER ON PAGE SIX, AMONG THEM BEING THAT SHE'D SUFFERED FROM BULEMIA SINCE SHE WAS A TEENAGER. REMEMBERING THAT ALSO REMINDED HIM (PAINFULLY, NOW) THAT SHE'D BEEN ENGAGED BEFORE, BUT HE PUSHED THAT FACT AWAY FOR NOW. CHARLOTTE HAD BEEN IN LOVE BEFORE, AND SHE WAS HIS FIRST. SHE WAS THE ONLY WOMAN HE'D EVER BEEN IN LOVE WITH, BUT IN HER STORY, HE WASN'T THE ONLY ONE. THE THOUGHT PAINED HIM IN A WAY HE NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD, AND HE TRIED TO IGNORE IT AS HE FINISHED HIS STRAWBERRY. CLAIMING SHE'D EXERTED HERSELF TOO MUCH, HE OFFERED HER A SMILE AS HE WATCHED HER IN THE BATHROOM. SHE'D NEVER EXERTED HERSELF TOO MUCH BEFORE WITH HIM, AND HE BEGAN TO WORRY ABOUT HER. THIS BEHAVIOR DIDN'T SEEM NORMAL, BUT WHAT DID HE KNOW ABOUT NORMAL? THIS WAS THE CLOSEST HE'D EVER BEEN TO A 'NORMAL' RELATIONSHIP, AND MAYBE IF HE'D STAYED AROUND THE LAST TIME THEY WERE TOGETHER LIKE THIS, HE WOULD'VE SEEN THE SAME THING. BUT KNOWING HER PAST, AND HOW SHE'D GOTTEN SICK OVER THE FOOD, HE WONDERED HOW HONEST SHE WAS BEING WITH HIM. SLIDING OUT OF BED AND TYING THE OTHER SHEET AROUND HIS WAIST, PORTER ENTERED THE BATHROOM AS SHE FINISHED CLEANING UP AND WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND HER FROM BEHIND. HE LOOKED AT HER IN THE MIRROR, NOTICING THE GREENISH TINGE TO HER SKIN, HE FROWNED SLIGHTLY AND RAN HIS HANDS DOWN HER STOMACH IN AN ATTEMPT TO COMFORT HER. IF HE ONLY KNEW THE TRUTH... "CHARLOTTE... ARE YOU SURE THAT'S ALL IT IS?" HE ASKED, HIS VOICE TINTED WITH CONCERN AS HE PLAYED WITH HER HAIR THAT HUNG DOWN BESIDE HER FACE. "DON'T LIE TO ME, BABE." HIS BROW DREW DOWN AND HIS ICE BLUE EYES REGARDED HER WITH A WORRIED FROWN. HE KNEW ALL ABOUT HER BULEMIA, AND IF SHE WAS GOING THROUGH THAT AGAIN, HE WANTED TO BE THERE FOR HER. BESIDES, HE HAD PROBABLY CAUSED IT TO COME BACK DUE TO HIS RECENT BEHAVIOR. HE NEVER CONSIDERED OTHER CAUSES FOR HER NAUSEA. WHAT OTHER REASONS COULD THERE BE? "IF THIS IS MY FAULT..." HE SIGHED AND GLANCED DOWN AT HER SHOULDER WHERE HIS FINGERS BEGAN TO DRAW CIRCLES ON HER SKIN. "I'LL BE HERE FOR YOU NO MATTER WHAT. I DON'T CARE IF YOU HAVE BULEMIA. YOU KNOW THAT." HE LOOKED BACK UP AT HER REFLECTED IN THE MIRROR AND OFFERED HER A SMALL, SUBDUED SMILE. HE BELONGED TO HER WHOLEY AND COMPLETELY, AND HE WOULD NEVER TURN HIS BACK ON HER AGAIN. FEELING AWKWARD, HE SMILED AND TURNED BACK TO THE ROOM, GRABBING UP THE ROOM SERVICE MENU. TOSSING IT ACROSS THE ROOM, HE TURNED BACK TO GRIN AT HER. "THERE. IT'S GONE. WE CAN EAT WHEN YOU WANT TO EAT." HE DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO BEHAVE IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS ONE, SO HE KNEW HE WAS MORE AWKWARD THAN HE WISHED. WALKING SLOWLY BACK INTO THE BATHROOM TO LOOK AT HER IN THE MIRROR ONCE AGAIN, HE WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND HER AND HUGGED HER TO HIS CHEST AS HE KISSED HER NECK SOFTLY. "I KNOW I SOUND LIKE AN IDIOT, BUT I JUST CAN'T LOSE YOU NOW THAT I'VE JUST GOTTEN YOU BACK." tag: charlotte word count: 733 notes: porter's so adorably awkward xD

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

No, she wasn’t sure that exerting herself was all that was bothering her stomach. Words threatened to pour out of her mouth but she bit her tongue, holding back the words. There was no way she could ruin a moment this perfect with the idea of something that seemed so impossible. They had been so careful in the past, yet it seemed as though one moment in the kitchen, of all damn places, would come back to haunt her. His hands fell on her stomach and she closed her eyes to stop herself from flinching. He had no idea, Charlotte knew, but that didn’t stop her from wondering if somehow he did. It seemed impossible, but maybe he knew deep down. But the next words out of his mouth sent her temper flaring. How did he know about the bulimia? Part of her mind knew that he had heard from dozens of others but that didn’t stop her from stepping out his grasp and turning to glare at him. That was one word she would make sure would never be spoken around her.

A mistake was what those months were. Her mother hadn’t noticed a thing at first, focusing on her daughter’s fashion choices to the ball, but Ophelia eventually caught on and sent her daughter to Switzerland to solve the issue. Everyone but her two best friends thought she was there with her uncle, but she hadn’t been. No, there had never been a relapse, and the fact that Porter had the balls to mention the issue as though he knew all about it made her mad. Granter, the flaring hormones weren’t helping, but she pushed all rational to the back of her mind. ”You are not allowed to mention that word around me. I don’t give a shit if you talk to the god damn press about it, but you will not say the b word around me.” Her voice came out as a hiss and she watched him carelessly toss the menu across the room. No, he could not act as though everything was alright. It wasn’t and he didn’t know otherwise.

Turning back, she sighed and her head bent down, overlooking the sink. She heard his calming words and felt a kiss placed against her neck and felt her emotions flare once again. Biting her bottom lip, she wanted to say something cruel that would destroy him, but she didn’t. Charlotte knew that Porter was sensitive about everything, yet all she wanted to do was let her frustration out somehow on someone that would always love her. ”You won’t,” she responded calmly, before turning to look at him. A small, but fake smile graced her lips as she gently pushed him out of the bathroom. ”I’m just going to take a shower. It helps me relax. Then we’ll go to dinner, ok?” her voice was begging him to not continue the topic, to just drop it, and she gently closed the door in his face. Her heart ached, but she needed to figure everything out.

Quickly turning on the shower, she opened the cabinet under the sink and rummaged through the boxes and soap that were hidden underneath. Sevvie and Reese had always kept a pregnancy test stuck in the back for emergencies over the summer, and while nothing had happened to the two of them, Charlotte had never removed it. She ripped open the box and sat on the toilet, positioning the stick underneath her. After she finished peeing, she placed the test on the counter, knowing she had to wait five minutes. Five long and horrible minutes. Quietly locking the bathroom door, she turned and stepped into the shower, the warm water surrounding her.
The shower was short and pointless, but once she stepped out and wrapped a towel around her damp body, her eyes went to the test and she gasped before banging into the shower glass. A plus mark was etched across the screen and tears pooled out of her eyes. Apparently there was a sea monkey growing in her stomach and had no plan on leaving any time soon.

She didn’t register the door being forced open by Porter, his concerned voice surrounding her. All she knew were that tears were falling down her face and eventually, he would leave her. He didn’t want baggage. And this was one bag too much.

you're too curious for your own good

template made by pan of caution 2.0

[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you NOT MEANING TO HURT HER IN HIS CONCERN, HE WAS SURPRISED WHEN SHE SNAPPED AT HIM. THE ANGER FLARED IN HER FACE, AND HE LOOSENED HIS HOLD ON HER AS SHE SPUN AND FACED HIM, HISSING THAT HE BETTER NEVER SPEAK THE 'B' WORD AGAIN. FROWNING AT HER SUDDEN OUTBURST, HE PLANTED HIS HANDS ON HIS HIPS AND FIXED HER WITH A STARE. "REALLY? IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL. BESIDES, YOU KNOW I WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING TO THE PRESS ABOUT IT. I HATE THOSE BASTARDS AS MUCH AS YOU DO." TAKING HER BACK INTO HIS ARMS AS SHE CALMED DOWN, HE TURNED HER AROUND AND PLANTED SOFT LITTLE KISSES ON THE BACK OF HER NECK, SMILING AS SHE SQUIRMED IN HIS ARMS. WHEN SHE CONFIRMED HE WOULDN'T LOSE HER, HE SMILED AT HER IN THE MIRROR. "IT'S NICE TO HEAR THAT." ALTHOUGH HE COULD NEVER ADMIT TO UNDERSTANDING WOMEN, AND HE DIDN'T BEGIN TO TRY TO FIGURE OUT CHARLOTTE'S LITTLE OUTBURST, HE STILL COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT HER. THAT WAS WHAT MADE THEM PERFECT. SHE WAS EVERYTHING HE WASN'T, AND THE SAME IN REVERSE. THEY COMPLIMENTED EACH OTHER PERFECTLY. THAT REMINDED HIM THAT SHE'D ONCE FOUND A GUY SHE THOUGHT COMPLIMENTED HER PERFECTLY, AND THAT WAS LONG BEFORE THEY'D KNOWN ONE ANOTHER. HE HADN'T KNOWN THE GUY CHARLOTTE HAD BEEN ENGAGED TO ALTHOUGH THEY WERE IN THE SAME SOCIAL HEMISPHERE, AND HE HADN'T CARED WHEN SHE'D BEEN ENGAGED TO HIM. NOW, HOWEVER, THE THOUGHT THAT SHE'D LOVED SOMEONE ELSE PLAGUED HIS MIND WITH SELF-DOUBT. HE WASN'T USED TO FEELING VULNERABLE, AND HE DIDN'T LIKE IT. PART OF HIM WANTED TO FIND HER EX-FIANCE TO SEE HOW HE COMPARED, BUT ANOTHER PART OF HIM KNEW THAT WAS HIS JEALOUSY AND FOOLISHNESS TALKING. HE WAS PORTER MIDDLETON, DAMN IT. HE HAD NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. WALKING TO THE ROOM AND SHOWING HER HE DIDN'T CARE IF SHE HAD BULEMIA, BY TOSSING THE MENU ACROSS THE ROOM, HE RETURNED TO THE BATHROOM DOOR WHERE SHE MET HIM. "WELL, IF YOU GET LONELY..." HE TWEAKED HIS EYEBROWS AND SMILED AT HER PLAYFULLY AS SHE SHUT THE DOOR IN HIS FACE. FROWNING WHEN SHE COULD NO LONGER SEE HIM, HE MADE HIS WAY ACROSS THE ROOM AS HE HEARD THE WATER TURN ON IN THE SHOWER. RETRIEVING A CLEAN PAIR OF BOXERS, HE DROPPED THE SHEET TIED AROUND HIS WAIST AND PULLED ON THE UNDERWEAR. WALKING TO THE WINDOW, HE LEANED ON THE WINDOWSILL AND LOOKED OUT AT THE EIFFEL TOWER IN THE DARKNESS. HE COULD STILL SEE THE FIREWORKS AND COULD STILL HEAR CHARLOTTE'S LAUGHTER IN HIS MIND. THE REMINDER BROUGHT A SMILE TO HIS FACE AS HE LOOKED DOWN AT THE TRAFFIC GOING BY ON THE STREET BELOW. HE REALLY HAD NO CONCEPT OF TIME PASSING UNTIL HE GOT BORED AND GLANCED AT THE CLOCK ON THE WALL AND REALIZED CHARLOTTE HAD BEEN IN THE BATHROOM FOR ALMOST AN HOUR. PULLING ON HIS SHIRT, HE BEGAN BUTTONING THE BOTTOM BUTTONS AS HE WALKED TO THE DOOR. TAPPING ON IT WITH HIS KNUCKLES, HE CALLED HER NAME BUT HEARD NO ANSWER. EXAMINING THE KNOB, HE KNEW IT WAS THE KIND THAT IF HE TWISTED HARD ENOUGH, IT WOULD SNAP PAST ITS BREAKING POINT AND HE COULD PUSH IT OPEN. TWISTING IT HARD, HE SHOVED IT OPEN AND STEAM BILLOWED OUT AROUND HIM, TEMPORARILY BLINDING HIM. "CHARLOTTE? ARE YOU ALMOST READY...?" THE STEAM CLEARED, AND HE WAS MET WITH A VISION OF HER STANDING IN ALMOST THE SAME PLACE HE'D LEFT HER IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR, EXCEPT SHE WAS HOLDING SOMETHING. WALKING TOWARD HER THROUGH THE HEAT, NOTICING THE SHOWER WAS STILL RUNNING AND SHE HAD OBVIOUSLY NEVER BEEN IN IT, HE REACHED OUT TO TOUCH HER ARM. "CHARLOTTE... WHAT'S WRONG?" AS HE TOUCHED HER ARM, SHE TURNED SLIGHTLY AND HE SAW TEARS RUNNING DOWN HER FACE. HIS BROW DREW DOWN IN CONSTERNATION, AND HIS GAZE FLOWED DOWN TO WHAT SHE HELD IN HER HAND. THE BLOOD RAN OUT OF HIS FACE, AND HE NO LONGER FELT THE HEAT IN THE ROOM. GRABBING THE STICK OUT OF HER HAND, HE STARED OUT IT, HIS JAW DROPPING OPEN IN SHOCK. HIS FINGERS WENT NUMB AND HE DROPPED THE POSITIVE PREGNANCY TEST ON THE FLOOR. STARING BLANKLY FORWARD, HIS EYES SLOWLY CAME INTO FOCUS ON CHARLOTTE'S DISTRAUGHT FACE. "ARE YOU... YOU'RE..." HE COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS. THIS COULDN'T BE HAPPENING. SO SOON AFTER WHAT HAD HAPPENED WITH SVETLANA, AND NOW CHARLOTTE? HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO THE SAME GUY? HE COULD STILL SEE SVETLANA'S SICKENED FACE, HER EMACIATED BODY, AND HER GLAZED OVER EYES AS SHE TOLD HIM, UNFEELING, THAT THE BABY WAS DEAD. CHARLOTTE DIDN'T KNOW THIS, AND AS HE LOOKED INTO HER FACE, HE KNEW SHE MUST BE THINKING EXACTLY WHAT HE'D BEEN THINKING ONLY AN HOUR BEFORE. SHE WAS THINKING SHE WAS THE SECOND ONE IN HIS LIFE FOR THIS TO HAPPEN TO, JUST LIKE HE WAS HER SECOND LOVE. HOW COULD HE EXPLAIN HOW HE FELT TO HER? WITH SVETLANA, HE HADN'T WANTED A CHILD BECAUSE HE HADN'T LOVED HER, BUT HE LOVED CHARLOTTE WITH EVERY PART OF HIM. STILL, HE WAS SO AFRAID OF BECOMING A FATHER, IT LITERALLY CRIPPLED HIM. STEPPING AWAY FROM HER, HIS BACK HIT THE WALL AND HE TOOK A DEEP BREATH. "YOU'RE PREGNANT..." IT WASN'T A QUESTION. HE KNEW HOW TO READ A PREGNANCY TEST. BUT THE AWKWARD, RAW PAIN FROM WHAT HAD ONLY HAPPENED WEEKS BEFORE WITH SVETLANA WAS RIGHT THERE IN HIS FACE. HOW COULD HE TELL HER HE WASN'T MAD WHEN SHE WAS PROBABLY FURIOUS WITH HIM, PROBABLY REMEMBERING ALL OF THE PAIN HE'D PUT HER THROUGH. "CHARLOTTE..." HE STOOD FROM THE WALL AND FORCED HIMSELF TO SWALLOW AS HE TOOK A STEP TOWARD HER. REACHING OUT, HE INSTINCTIVELY WRAPPED ONE ARM AROUND HER SHOULDERS AND CRUSHED HER INTO HIS CHEST IN A DESPERATE EMBRACE. HE BRUSHED HER HAIR DOWN AND KISSED THE TOP OF HER HEAD. HE WAS SCARED OUT OF HIS MIND, BUT HE STILL WANTED HER TO KNOW HE LOVED HER WITH ALL OF HIS HEART. "YOU'RE PREGNANT," HE REPEATED AS HE PULLED AWAY FROM HER AND LOOKED INTO HER SAD BROWN EYES. "I LOVE YOU. I... IS THIS THE FIRST YOU'VE FOUND OUT? THIS IS WHY YOU WERE SICK, WASN'T IT?" HE WASN'T ACCUSING, JUST CURIOUS EVEN THOUGH HIS VOICE SHOOK WITH NERVOUSNESS. HE WAS GOING TO BE A FATHER. HOPEFULLY HE WOULDN'T SUCK AS MUCH AT THAT AS HE HAD AT BEING HER FIANCE SO FAR. "DON'T GET ME WRONG, I'M SCARED SHITLESS, BUT... I'M NOT MAD OR WEIRDED OUT OR ANYTHING." HE SMILED TIMIDLY AT HER AND LAUGHED NERVOUSLY. CLEARING HIS THROAT, HE KISSED THE TOP OF HER HEAD AGAIN AND THEN LOOKED INTO HER EYES ONCE MORE. "YOU NEED TO KNOW SOMETHING... SHE... SHE LOST THE BABY." HE KNEW CHARLOTTE WOULD UNDERSTAND WHO HE WAS TALKING ABOUT, AND HE DIDN'T WANT TO SAY HER NAME OUT LOUD. NOT HERE AND NOW. "SHE'S FUCKED UP AND SHE KILLED IT." SHAKING HIS HEAD, NOT DISGUISING HIS DISGUST ALTHOUGH HE DIDN'T HATE SVETLANA FOR BEING SO BROKEN. IT WASN'T HER FAULT. THEY'D RUINED THEIR LIVES TOGETHER. NOW, HE SAW HER AS A FRIEND WHO DESPERATELY NEEDED HELP, BUT SHE COULD ONLY EVER COME SECOND TO WHAT MATTERED MOST TO HIM: CHARLOTTE AND THEIR CHILD. PUTTING HIS HAND BENEATH HER CHIN, HE MADE HER LOOK UP AT HIM, ALLOWING HIS LOVE FOR HER TO SHOW IN HIS EYES. "I LOVE YOU, CHARLOTTE, MORE THAN ANYTHING. I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME, AND I WANT OUR SON OR DAUGHTER TO BE JUST LIKE YOU. IF IT TURNS OUT LIKE ME, THEN WE'RE FUCKED." HE LAUGHED A RELIEVED SORT OF LAUGH AS HE PULLED HER INTO HIS ARMS ONCE AGAIN. tag: charlotte word count: 1299 notes: he's so adorable. he would be such a cute daddy

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0

[CHARLOTTE HIRTH]

hate to stare....

Her temper was flaring and she wanted a fight. That was what she wanted. In order to get her aggressions out, she needed to pick on someone and that someone just happened to be Porter. And as he mentioned that it wasn’t a big of a deal, she felt her temper flare even more. Of course it was a big deal, or else she wouldn’t be getting angry. ”It’s not a big deal? Of course it’s a big deal! It’s only my biggest insecurity, one of my biggest regrets. It’s part of who I am and I’m sorry if that doesn’t seem like a ‘big deal’ to you.” her voice cracked at the last word and she continued to glare at the wall. Her stomach rolled and for a moment she thought she would be back over the toilet. But Charlotte swallowed whatever her stomach was threatening to expose. But as she fell back into his arms, she realized that all the anger in the world would never make her stop loving him. ”It’s nice to be in love, isn’t it?” Charlotte was hoping that he actually enjoyed being in love, that he actually wanted to be with her forever.

But as his voiced pulled her out of the steam surrounding her, she couldn’t help but feel her emotions collapse. Tears continued to pour down her cheeks and she opened her mouth to say something, to warn him what the answer was, but he saw it too. Charlotte looked at him and saw that he was speechless, that he too was not expecting this. Porter didn’t want this and now he probably hated her and would toss her aside. She wanted to cry and pull the sheets over her head and eat chocolate macaroons and watch romantic comedies forever and ever. ”I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. I didn’t want this to happen” she wailed, her voice reaching a high octave. Charlotte knew that she probably sounded five, but she could care less. Everything was falling apart and would fall apart if she didn’t stop it. He was her everything. Porter took a step away and she felt as though she had a disease.

Charlotte pressed her face into her hands and sobbed for reasons she didn’t understand. She was worried that he would leave her, that he would toss her aside and find someone that wasn’t pregnant and find someone prettier and smarter. Her name was whispered from the man she loved and when he pulled her into his gasp, she gasped before pressing her face into his chest. Porter’s welcoming smell surrounded her and she felt herself immediately calm down. Her heart was beating fast and she wrapped her arms around his waist, refusing to let him go.

Removing her face from his damp shirt, she looked at him. Her face felt puffy and horrible, but that was alright. She sniffed before answering. ”I had a feeling a week or so ago, but I didn’t know until today. I just…I’ve been getting sick in the morning and we weren’t talking so I thought it was nerves but I just had a feeling I should take a test and and and…” her voice trailed off as she felt more tears form in her eyes. He wasn’t mad, however, but Charlotte was beyond frustrated and scared and everything else. Her mouth opened into a perfect O as she listened to his next words. Part of her was thrilled that she would be the only one producing offspring from Porter, but another part felt disgusted and sad. How Sev could destroy a child for some reason was something she could not grasp. But she knew there must have been some pain coming from his side must hurt him deep, and she knew that Sev was probably hurting as well. She wanted to call her friend, but she knew better. Sevvie was on her shit list. ”Porter, I’m sorry” she whispered, nuzzling her face into his neck.

Her hormones suddenly changed from sad to something else. As Porter admitted he loved her and would love the baby growing inside of her, she let a watery smile escape her lips. ”I hope he or she is like you. He’ll be sensitive and loving and amazing like you.” she whispered, bringing her lips to his and melting at his touch.

The shower still ran behind her and she brought her lips to his ear. ”You’re being so sensitive and understanding, it’s kind of a turn on,” she whispered, running her hands gently down the front of her shirt. ”But you’re all dressed and fancy looking, I guess I’ll have to take this shower by myself.” she said dramatically, dropping the sheets with a soft thud against the floor. Turning around and giving her butt a little shake, she made her way into the shower, relaxing in the warm water.

Charlotte knew this conversation was not over. There was no way. She would bring up her insecurities about her bulimia and she would bring up her ex-fiance, but not right now. She couldn’t. There was a baby in the mix and it was hard just to think about adding another human into the picture and thinking too much into her past. Oddly enough, she knew nothing of his past, and that was something Charlotte needed to fix.

you're too curious for your own good

template made by pan of caution 2.0

[PORTER MIDDLETON]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i56.tinypic.com/2zgu9hc.jpg); width: 440px; padding-top:10px;] there's no sunrise without you AS THE TRUTH THAT HE WAS GOING TO BE A FATHER - THE TRUTH HE'D HEARD TWICE IN A MONTH - SET IN, THIS TIME HE WASN'T ANGRY. BEFORE, WHEN SVETLANA HAD TOLD HIM, IN HER DRUGGED UP BEDRAGGLED CONDITION, HE'D BEEN ANGRY AND SOMEHOW FELT BETRAYED. IT WASN'T LIKE SHE'D GOTTEN PREGNANT ON PURPOSE - NEITHER OF THEM HAD WANTED THAT - BUT HE HAD KNOWN THEN, EVEN THOUGH HE'D STILL BEEN MOSTLY DENYING HIS FEELINGS FOR CHARLOTTE TO HIMSELF, THAT HE DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE KIDS WITH SVETLANA. THEY'D BEEN ENEMIES UP UNTIL THAT POINT, AND THEY'D ONLY FUCKED BECAUSE THEY BOTH WERE TRYING TO FORGET PEOPLE THEY COULD NEVER FORGET. EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT SITUATION HAD BEEN A MISTAKE, BUT THIS, HERE AND NOW WITH CHARLOTTE, THIS WAS RIGHT. ONCE, HE'D NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE, BUT NOW HE DID BECAUSE OF HER. BEFORE, HE NEVER WANTED TO HAVE CHILDREN BECAUSE HE'D NEVER THOUGHT HE'D FIND A WOMAN HE LOVED AND WANTED TO HAVE CHILDREN WITH. THAT HAD CHANGED BECAUSE OF HER ALSO. HE'D BE SCARED HE'D BE A HORRIBLE DAD UNTIL THE BABY WAS BORN, AND PROBABLY AFTERWARD. HE KNEW CHARLOTTE WOULD BE A WONDERFUL MOTHER, EVEN THOUGH HE FELT TOO AWKWARD ADMITTING THAT TO HER. SHE WAS STRONGER THAN HIM. SHE HAD LIVED THROUGH BEING HIS LOVER AFTER ALL, AND ALL OF THE SHIT HE'D PUT HER THROUGH. "IT'S NICE TO KNOW IT'S POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO LOVE A JERK LIKE ME," HE ANSWERED, SMILING HANDSOMELY DOWN AT HER IN HIS ARMS. HER FACE RESTED ON HIS CHEST, AND HIS SHIRT WAS NOW THOROUGHLY SOAKED FROM HER TEARS AND THE STEAM IN THE ROOM WHICH HAD MADE HIM HOT AND SWEATY. PULLING BACK FROM HER AS SHE APOLOGIZED FOR WHAT HAD HAPPENED WITH SVET'S BABY, HE TOOK HER FACE IN HIS HANDS AND LOOKED DEEPLY INTO HER EYES. "DON'T BE SORRY. IT'S BETTER THIS WAY. IT'S SAD, YES, BUT I NEVER WANTED A CHILD WITH HER. SHE WAS A MISTAKE. THE BABY WAS A MISTAKE. THIS BABY..." HE GENTLY PUT HIS HAND ON HER BELLY AND SMILED A SMALL SMILE, "... IS NOT A MISTAKE." HE SMILED BROADLY AND KISSED HER FOREHEAD BEFORE TAKING HER IN HIS ARMS ONCE MORE. FEELING HER PRESSED AGAINST HIM IN THE WARM, STEAMY ROOM MADE HIM FEEL CALM AND AT EASE. HE'D NEVER THOUGHT HE COULD FEEL THAT WAY AFTER FINDING OUT HE WAS GOING TO BE A FATHER. LIFE SURE HAD A WAY OF MAKING A FOOL OUT OF HIM. I hope he or she is like you. He’ll be sensitive and loving and amazing like you. HE CHUCKLED AT THAT AND SHOOK HIS HEAD. "PLEASE DON'T WISH THAT ON US." HE LAUGHED AND LEANED IN TO KISS HER AS HER LIPS GREW CLOSE, BUT SHE PULLED AWAY JUST IN TIME BEFORE HE COULD KISS HER. RAISING AN EYEBROW, HE FROZE AS SHE WHISPERED SEDUCTIVELY IN HIS EAR THAT HIS SOFTER SIDE TURNED HER ON. CHUCKLING DARKLY, HE WATCHED HER WITH A LUSTY GLINT TO HIS EYE AS SHE DROPPED HER SHEET AND SLID INTO THE SHOWER. "YOU'RE GOING TO BE THE DEATH OF ME," HE MURMURED TO HIMSELF WITH A SMILE. HIS SHIRT AND PANTS AND BOXERS JOINED THE SHEET ALMOST AS QUICKLY AS SHE'D DROPPED IT. OPENING THE GLASS DOOR, HE SLIPPED INTO THE STEAMY SHOWER BEHIND HER, MOVING UP TO STAND WITH HIS CHEST PRESSED AGAINST HER BACK IN THE HOT WATER. THANKFULLY, MONEY BOUGHT THEM THE BEST WATER HEATER IN THE WORLD, AND ALTHOUGH THE WATER HAD BEEN RUNNING FOR AN HOUR, IT WAS STILL TOASTY. THEIR SKIN SLID AGAINST ONE ANOTHER AS HE MOVED HER WET HAIR TO ONE SHOULDER AND LEANED IN TO KISS THE BACK OF HER NECK DOWN TO WHERE HER SHOULDERBLADES MET. HIS TONGUE SLIPPED OUT AND LICKED THE HOT WATER FROM HER SKIN BEFORE HE GENTLY TURNED HER TO FACE HIM. ALTHOUGH HE'D BEEN TIRED BEFORE, HE WAS TIRED NO LONGER. PULLING HER AGAINST HIM, HE WRESTLED WITH HER LEGS AND PICKED HER UP AROUND HIM AS THE WATER RUSHED AROUND THEM. CHARLOTTE BEING PREGNANT DIDN'T TURN HIM OFF IN THE LEAST. IF ANYTHING, HE FELT MORE FREE BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY AROUND PROTECTION. HOW IRONIC. THEIR KISSES MADE HIM HOTTER THAN THE WATER EVER COULD, AND HER SKIN SLIPPING AND SLIDING OVER HIS, CLINGING TO HIM AND RELEASING AS THE WATER SEPARATED THEM, GAVE HIM MORE ENERGY THAN HE IMAGINED HE COULD HAVE. SHE MAY HAVE BELONGED TO ANOTHER MAN IN HER PAST, BUT SHE BELONGED TO HIM NOW AS HE BELONGED TO HER. tag: charlotte word count: 767 notes: steamy shower scenes ftw!

credit to BABY DARLING ! @ caution 2.0